I am very aware that I am going to be scoffed at for making a statement like managers who aspire to be leaders should treat their staff (direct and indirect reports) as they would treat their kids. So, let me explain what I mean: Difficult circumstances arise at work all the time, and some of those times may have to do with your staff’s performance at work, however my suggestion is that before you take the next step, superimpose a mental image of your staff over a mental image of your kids; then take a decision.

Do not play favorites at work:

A while ago, I attended a conference for IT professionals. The keynote speaker talked about a survey that was sent out to a large number of professionals asking them for the most sought after they wished their immediate managers had. Ladies and gentlemen, there were a few votes for intelligence, there were votes for Leadership, Empathy and so on and so forth, but the key quality that people voted for was Fairness.

Does this not give us a hint in some sort of an indirect way that managers tend to play favorites with their staff? Would you ever want to play favorites with for your kids? If you answered ‘no’, then by treating your staff as your kids, you will not fall into the trap of favoritism at work.

Be compassionate towards mistakes:

Accept that your team members are going to make mistakes, errors and omissions at some time or the other, some of which may even make you look bad, however you should deal with it in a compassionate manner. As they say: “Not making mistakes is the biggest mistake that you can make”.

If the quality of their work is not up to the mark would you ever want to yell at your kids? If you answered ‘no’, then by treating your staff as your kids, you will be compassionate about your team member’s mistakes.

Support their search for passion:

One cannot deliver their best until they discover what they excel at and feel passionately about. Learn to accept the fact that what drives you may not be the same as what drives your team members. Assign them tasks that are functionally diverse to judge their strengths and weaknesses. It will be a lesson of self discovery for them as well.

My little one always claimed that ballet was her favorite form of dance, so we spent in excess of two hundred dollars on the dress, shoes and the fee, however after two lessons she declared that ballet was not her favorite and dropped out.

If your kids lose interest in what they do, would you stop them from trying out new things? If you answered ‘no’, then by treating your staff as your kids, you will never disapprove of their failings in the search of their passion.

They come in a mixed baggage:

Here is a couplet from a well known East Indian poet: Nida Fazli.

While a direct translation is difficult, Nida seems to be saying that every single person is a combination of multiple and varied personalities, and in order to analyze someone, one should look at them from different angles. Learn to accept that everyone has their own quirks and their faults and that one cannot expect to have only the Ying or the Yang. Would you want designer kids with a uni-dimensional personality? If you answered ‘no’, then by treating your staff as your kids, you will accept their faults as much as you will accept and welcome their strengths.

Encourage them to fly away:

Mentor and teach your staff so that they have the skills to leave the nest anytime that they wish to, but treat them well so that they don’t have to. However, if after a few years, they do decide to leave, then be happy for them.

Do you want your kids to stay with you forever? If you answered ‘no’, then by treating your Staff as your kids, you will be have the satisfaction of mentoring them and helping them achieve their career aspirations rather than keeping them forever in your organization.

With the above, I am not advising that one should be overly indulgent or that you should not take a strong step if a team member is not contributing even after repeated warnings. Give them their “timeouts” when nothing else works, but have compassion in your heart when giving them a “timeout”, just like you do with your kids – you do that because you wish them well and you care about their future, and not with the intent of teaching them a lesson.

Finally, if the above arguments about personal growth do not convince you enough and you still believe that every single person is responsible for their own career (and that includes your staff), then consider the fact that if nothing, it will help in your own career growth. Only those executives move up to higher leadership positions who are able to demonstrate that they are capable of forming teams and leading them by ably mentoring their team members.